The More Things Change...

phone dialing...phone rings...
British Voice: Prime Minister's Office, Prime Minister speaking.
American Voice:
Greetings! This is the Secretary of War at the State Department of the United States...
We have a problem.
The Companies want something done about this sluggish world economic situation.
Profits have been running more than a little thin lately and we need to stimulate some growth.
Now, we know there's an alarmingly high number of young people roaming around in your country with nothing to do but stir up trouble for the police and damage private property.
It doesn't look like they'll ever get a job...
It's about time we did something constructive with these people...
We've got thousands of 'em here too.
They're crawling all over...
The companies think it's time we all sit down, have a serious get together, and START ANOTHER WAR...
Prime Minister: uhh ohhhhhhh ohhhh
The president? Oh he loves the idea!
All those missiles streaming over-head, to-an-fro...napalm...people running down the road, skin on fire...
The Soviets seem up for it...The Kremlin's been itching for the real thing for years! Want a little going away present for Mr. Breshnev.
Hell, Afghanistans no fun...
So whadya say? We dont even have to win this war!
We just want to cut down on some of this excess population...
Now look, just start up a draft, draft as many of those people as you can.
We'll call up every last youngster we can get our hands on and give 'em an hour or two to learn how to use an automatic rifle and send 'em on their way...
El Salvador? How bought Northern Ireland?
Or a moderatly repressive regime in South America?
We'll just cook up a good Soviet threat story in the Middle East. We need that oil!
We had Libya all ready to go and Colonel Khadafi's hit squad didn't even show up. I tellya...that man is UNREALIABLE.
The Kremlin had there fingers on the button just like we did for that one..
Now just think for a minute...
We can make this war so big...SOOOO big...
The more people we kill in this war... The more economy will prosper...
We can get ride of practically every one on your uh- "dole queue" if we plan this right.
Take every loafer on welfare right off computer rolls...
Prime Minister: ohhhhhhh mmmmmm ohhhhh
Now dont worry about those demonstraters... just PUMP UP YOUR DRUG SUPPLY.
So many people have hooked themselves on heroine and amphetamines since we took over, its just like Vietnam.
We had everybody so busy with LSD it never got too strong.
keep the war functioning just fine...its easy.
We've got college kids so interested in beer they don't even care
that we start putting manufacturing germ bombs again.
Put a nuclear stockpile in their back yard, they wouldnt even no what it looked like....
So how bought it?
Look- WAR IS MONEY -
The arms manufacturers tell me unless we get our bomb factories up to full production the whole economy is going to collapse!
The Soviets are in the same boat!
we all think its TIME FOR THE BIG ONE!
So whadya say?!?
Prime Minister: ...ohhh it's marvelous....that's excellent...
Secretary of War: We knew you'd agree! The Companies will be very pleased.

from "Kindy Sex Makes The World Go Round" Dead Kennedys, 1987